O Lord, we pray, speak in this place, in the calming of our minds and the longing of our hearts, by the words of my lips and in the meditations of our hearts. Speak, O Lord, for your servants listen. Amen.
I don't know about you - but I get scared at times. At times I feel afraid.
The fear I am talking about is the kind of fear that arises when a person walks into a crowded room and suddenly it goes silent, the fear that can overwhelm you when you see two people look at you and then begin to whisper to each other, the fear that arises when someone you love and need is angry at you, the fear that happens when your father criticizes you, the fear that clutches at you when you have been told for weeks how your company has to cut staff and suddenly your boss calls you and says he wants to talk to you about your annual performance evaluation.
I don't feel this fear as often as I used to, buut every now and then it reaches out and tries to grab me, every now and then I am overwhelmed by self-doubt, every now and then - I wonder if I am good enough, and fear that I am not.
At such times I stop for a minute and remember that God thinks that I am good enough. And that if God thinks I am good enough - it matters not what I think of myself, or what my fear is trying to make me think of myself.
And the moment passes.
The reason I mention this today - is because both the Gospel reading and the Reading from Paul's Letter to the Hebrews speak about having confidence - about not being alarmed by the signs of the end of our world - nor being fearful when it appears that we are about to meet God.
As I thought about these texts during this past week - as I thought about how Jesus encourages his disciples in the Gospel to not be alarmed when the temple is destroyed and nations rise against nations, and earthquakes and famines overwhelm various parts of the world, and about how Paul tells us that because of Christ's sacrifice we can enter the Holy of Holies with confidence and hope and there meet the living God - the God that, at one time, no mortal could look upon and live, I wondered why it was so important for Jesus and for Paul to say these things.
I wondered why so much stress is laid upon holding fast to our hope without wavering and upon encouraging one another when we see the Day of the Lord approaching.
You see, to a large extent I have lost track of my fear.
When I was younger I lived in a house of fear, a house of physical and emotional violence. I knew what it was to cower and cringe and what it was to hide my fear so that I would not be picked on again. But I moved from that house and I discovered the healing love of God in people around me.
I knew too one time the fear of failure, the fear of criticism, the fear of not being good enough. That fear was a constant companion for many years, but - except for the occasional time it reaches out to grab me, those times I mentioned at the very beginning of the sermon, I have left that fear behind, I know that God loves me - I have experienced his acceptance from the hands of others, and in the depths of my prayer and my meditations.
Nor do I worry about the end of the world, or about earthquake, famine or flood or war. I pray for the coming of a better world - for the coming of the kingdom, and on the simplest level of total and undeserved grace. I know that the trailer is on solid ground, that forest grows abundantly, that the creek in near where I am living has not flooded over its banks for many years, and that wars are something that happen when people fail to obey God. My duty is to share and to work for peace. My only fear is that I will forget to do all that I can do and forget to love as well as I can love.
As for meeting God face to face - while I have a certain desire to avoid the moment coming too soon, I also have an eagerness for it - a longing for it - that is based on a long standing assurance that God will treat me mercifully and justly and a long standing set of experiences that tell me that God has not yet once judged me as harshly as I judge myself or as others judge me.
I have lost track of almost all that I once feared. And so I suspect have most of you.
So when Jesus tells his disciples to not be alarmed when they see the temple thrown down so that not one stone is left standing upon another - and Paul speaks about how we can enter the inner sanctuary of God with confidence and hope - the full impact of those words can easily be lost.
While they are good words, encouraging words, they are not words that normally startle us or strike us with any sense of urgency, specially those of us who have been in the faith for a long time, those of us who have tested and trusted in the claims of Jesus for many years, and those of us who have, like me, achieved a certain number of years upon the face of this earth and have in those years been touched by genuine love - by Christ-like love.
But - my friends - if not for ourselves, then for the sake of others we need to relate strongly to the words of today's readings from the New Testament.
Fear for the most part may have passed us by, we may have outgrown it, or we may have become so familiar and so comfortable with the good news of God's love and care that fear rarely reaches out to grab us, but for many people fear is a all-pervasive presence: it shapes their behaviour during the daytime and moulds the dreams that they have at night. It leads ever greater numbers of teenagers to commit suicide, and it cripples the emotional and social lives of millions upon millions of adults.
For some there is no such thing as a day without fear, and I don't mean the physical fear that overwhelms us with Adrenalin when a car swerves towards us on the highway, nor do I mean the fear that rises in us when we hear that a loved one has cancer - the fear that we will be left alone - though that is getting closer to what I mean. NO, I mean the fear that life is pointless, the fear that no one will ever love us, the fear that every hand is either set against us - or totally ignorant of our existence. The fear that our children, our friends, and our lovers will never reach the goals we dream of for them, the fear that God does not exist and that if he exists - we are going straight to hell, the fear that when all is said and done - we will perish utterly from the face of this earth and that not one thing that we have done or will ever do will make a difference to anyone or anything, and I mean the fear that the World really is ending, that war and earthquake, and flood and famine will destroy everything and that in its place there will come nothing - nothing for the universe and nothing for me - that there will be no new heaven and no new earth for myself or my children - that all that is good now will cease to be and no good will arise in its place.
For the sake of those who feel these fears as a present reality - as a daily reality, we need to get in touch with the fears we have overcome and the confidence we have been given.
And we have to share that confidence, that faith, with those around us.
We have to share our confidence and our faith with those teenagers who believe that when a friend died the light went out of the world - and with the likes of the lonely old woman in the nursing home who, despite her relatively good health, keeps on saying that there is nothing to live for.
We have to bring out the treasure that we carry hidden in our hearts and hold it up before our work-aholic brothers or sisters - and tell them of the peace that comes from working less and playing with and loving our neighbours more.
We have to reveal the light that has placed in our lives by God to those whose whole world is the darkness of fear and inadequacy - sharing with them the fact that God truly does love us as we are - and that there are no conditions - no demands - no qualifications put on that love.
We have to reveal and live out the vision we have received of a new heaven and a new earth - of a kingdom of justice and truth, of joy and love, and of peace and plenty to those who fear that the end of this world is coming....
At one time my friends I could not imagine a day without fear. Now, because of what God has given me, because of how I have discovered God's love for me, I find it hard to imagine a day that has fear in it.
But for the sake of others - both you and I are called to imagine the fear that dwells in the hearts of so many around us, and to meet together and encourage one another with the encouragement that we have received.
We have to speak forth our faith and live out our belief so that all can hear and see.
Our help is in the name of The One who made heaven and earth, and in his Son Jesus Christ our Lord. He will not suffer your foot to be moved - He is your keeper, your defence at your right hand, from every evil he shall keep your soul, goodness and mercy will follow you all your life, and you will dwell in the house of the Lord forever. Amen
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